Every path has a puddle
by WiddleWombat
Summary: Edward struggles with his depression until one fateful weekend when Bella enters his life. These are the days that changed his life. Human.


**-EPOV-**

_**Depression is not sobbing and crying and giving vent, it is plain and simple reduction of feeling.  
>- Judith Guest<strong>_

"Eddie, I need your help. Please. You know I don't ask much from you. This is urgent. Call me."

The machine clicked. My sister, Rosalie, was right. She never asks anything from me. I am the family disgrace. No one asks anything of me. Neither do they expect it. Safe to say, I have lived up to my reputation. Oh, I was the golden child once, but those days are over. I wonder what she needs. Rosie is a psychologist. She joined the medical profession because I refused to do so, deeply disappointing our father. I have no profession at the moment and like it that way.

I potter about my unit. Grab a beer from the fridge, find a cooler, make myself comfortable on the sofa, and flick through a few TV channels. The phone rings and I pick it up without a greeting.

"Eddie?"

"Oh. Hey Rosie. I was just about to call you." I lie. She doesn't seem to notice.

"Eddie, I need your help. We have a class-three person needing emergency accommodation. I can't place her anywhere in Forks this time of night. Will you take her? She won't be any trouble."

"I don't know, Rosie. I like my privacy. Can't you take her?"

I hear Rosalie's exasperated sigh. "I'm in London this week. Don't you listen to anything I tell you? Please, just take her in until I get back and sort out something more permanent." London? I vaguely recall a conversation a few weeks ago and purse my lips in annoyance. Why can't people understand I just want to be left alone?

**-BPOV-**

"Ms. Swan?" My head snaps up at my name. Oh god, what have I done? He will be so mad. I'm twisting my fingers together anxiously, wondering if it's too late to change my mind. "Ms. Swan, we have a taxi-cab waiting for you. Dr. McCarthy has arranged for you to stay with her family while she is out of town. Do you have your things?"

I look up at the social worker and shake my head. "I have no things." I whisper.

"Oh. Well that's okay. Here, let me help you to the cab."

The driver doesn't speak to me as I watch the familiar Forks scenery from the backseat window. It is raining, of course. Just an ordinary Tuesday night, except tonight I have done something different. I left. I never leave. I am so scared.

The apartment block is well lit, showing its age. I run my fingers along the bricks making my way to the door. The driver said unit nineteen. I buzz. The door unlocks. No words are exchanged. With a deep breath, I move inside and head for the stairwell. After six flights I am exhausted, but can't bring myself to use an elevator. Not tonight anyway. I knock on the door when I reach unit nineteen.

**-EPOV-**

It takes her forever to knock on the door. I wonder if maybe-class three means retarded. Perhaps she needs help to my door? I decide I don't care. It's not my problem. I have enough problems of my own.

The petite brunette waiting at the door surprises me. I expected a blonde. I don't know why. She looks like she's been through the wringer. I hold the door open waiting for her to enter. She's cautious, like a cat in a new environment, not sure on her feet. I decide to get the niceties out of the way.

"Hi. I'm Edward. You're Bella. I understand you're staying here for a bit. I've got a spare room, only one bathroom though. And, ah, are you hungry?" She shakes her head.

"I'll show you the room?" I offer. I have never used this room. It's only furnished thanks to Mum. I am pleasantly surprised how...nice...it is. I watch Bella as she walks carefully around the small apartment room. She is filthy with sticks, leaves, dirt, and litter even in her long hair. Her body is covered in dirt and scratches, wearing wet clothes. I am so used to not noticing life that this small observation surprises me.

"Would you like to take a shower?" I ask.

"No thank you." She declines politely. Her voice is musical, not at all like Rosalie's or my mother's. Or Alice's for that matter. For a moment I think, '_She's going to make the room dirty if she sleeps in it like that._' I shrug. Not my problem. I leave her in the room heading back to my sofa.

**-BPOV-**

The room is elegant. He's watching me and it's making me anxious. I can see the resemblance between this man and my doctor, Dr. McCarthy. They both are quite tall, blonde, and green eyed. I get the feeling I'm not quite welcome here, being barely tolerated. He finally leaves me alone.

I look at my clothes, the only ones I have. They are filthy. I know I should take a shower, but have no other clothes. I don't know what to do. Everything has become so complicated. Why did I decide to leave? Things weren't so bad, were they? I think of my father and choke back tears. As much as I hate him, I miss him too. Will he have noticed my absence yet? I hate to think of it. He will be mad. He won't be able to afford his medication without me. I am effectively killing him by running away. But he is killing me by keeping me there. Dr. McCarthy made me see that. She has no idea what he does with me, but she can see I am dying. I left because she told me everything will be alright. Where is she now? I am scared.

I am also tired. I wonder how I will sleep without making anything dirty. It's been hours since I arrived here. I heard Edward go to bed a short while ago. Perhaps he has a room with a not so nice carpet? I find the laundry closet. The floors are tiled with a large pile of dirty laundry beside the washer. I sit tentatively on the dirty laundry. It doesn't smell too bad. I close the closet door with the tips of my fingers, leaving it slightly ajar so I can still get out when I need too. I snuggle into the warm, dampness of the dirty clothes and try to sleep.

**-EPOV-**

Shit. She didn't sleep in the bed. Shit. I can't find her anywhere. Rosie is going to kill me if I've lost her. Shit. Shit. I open the laundry closet door to pull out my coat. I'm going to have to check the neighbourhood. "Fuck!" I almost trip as I notice her sleeping in my dirty laundry and wake her.

"I'm so sorry, Bella! I didn't mean to wake you! I was...uh...getting my coat." I can tell she's embarrassed. I stand awkwardly, watching her wake up. I don't want to mention her odd bed choice. Hell, I have slept in worse places. I reach my hand down offering to help her stand. "Never mind, I don't feel like going out anymore." I tell her. Thank god she's still here. I sigh with relief.

"Come on. I'll put some coffee on." She follows me to the kitchen. I am feeling much better today. I have good days and I have bad days. Yesterday was a bad day. Today is starting as a good day. My mood swings give me vertigo at the best of times. I place a cup of coffee in front of Bella and wonder how I can make her life easier. Today it's my problem. Yesterday I couldn't give a fuck about anything or anyone. Today, I want to help. I need to decide what to do now, because who knows if in another hour I will no longer give a fuck. I have an idea.

Bella looks terrible. Her eyes are sunken and I notice she is bruised as well. How did I only see the dirt yesterday? I disgust myself. I reach out and touch her hand where it holds her coffee cup. Her eyes look up into mine. "Bella, please tell me if I'm out of line, but I was thinking. I...uh...my friend," I pause. I have not spoken about her in years. It hurts me to think of her now. I force myself to continue. "My friend would sometimes end up looking a bit like you do now," I point to the dirt and twigs in her hair, making sure she understands I'm not trying to insult her. "And she would always ask me to give her a makeover when she came home. I...uh...I still have her things. Would you like me to...try?"

That came out sounding weird. Makeover, Elizabeth never called it a makeover. And she wasn't my friend. She was my best friend. She was my wife. A tear slips down my cheek and I wipe at it furiously. I don't want Bella asking questions. My mind is back in those days, those glorious days when Elizabeth and I would come back from our adventures in the woods. We were dirty, worse than Bella, and we would wash each other clean before making passionate love in the shower. Why did I even offer? It was a stupid idea. My mood is low again.

**-BPOV-**

I think he has offered to bathe me? I'm confused. Does he want sex? That's what they all want, isn't it? He gave me his home for the night. I can hardly refuse him if that's what he wants. I notice a tear slip from his eyes and I feel torn inside. Whatever it is he was offering me seems to mean a lot to him. I am curious now.

"Yes, please. That would be nice." I still don't know what I agreed to, but don't want to see him cry.

He looks surprised. He nods and takes deep breaths. "Okay. Well, this will be something to fill in our day, right?" He tries to smile, but it doesn't reach his eyes. "Would you like toast? Or muesli?" I choose muesli and we watch each other eat; him in the kitchen, leaning against the oven and me, at the breakfast bar, directly opposite.

He puts our dishes in the dishwasher and disappears to the bathroom. I wonder if I'm supposed to follow, but stay where I am. He comes back to the kitchen looking nervous.

"I'm ready."

I gulp and nod. A small part of me knows whatever he has planned, I have been through worse. I couldn't imagine that this man could, in any way, be as bad as the monsters Dad invites over, night after night.

The bathroom is nice, clean. Different than what I am used to. There is a bathtub-size spa bath and he has bubbles going. He is rummaging in cupboards under the basin. I sigh and begin removing my clothes. Being naked in front of strangers is certainly something I am used to.

"Should I get in the bath?" I ask. I don't want to offend him and do things in the wrong order.

He is still on his knees looking through the cupboard. He turns to face me and I can tell my nudity shocked him. He hits his head on the basin and swears. His eyes are averted blushing wildly.

"Um. Yes."

I truly don't understand him. I sink into the bathtub. My muscles love the heat of the water and the pressure of the bubbles. I let a tear of relief slip down my face.

**-EPOV-**

I'm incredibly embarrassed after seeing her naked. She has been so shy. I hardly expected her to strip in front of me! In fact, I intended to leave the room and let her bathe alone, but she is here now and my presence obviously isn't bothering her.

I bring the bottles of shampoo, conditioner, body wash, face scrub, facemask over to the tub...all are Elizabeth's favourite rose scent. Bella has her eyes closed. I can see the path of a tear on her cheek. I wonder again what class-three means. Why she needed a place to stay so urgently. Where did she come from? How old is she? She looks so young and vulnerable lying in my bathtub.

Grabbing a large basin, I fill it with water from her bath. She opens an eye and sits up. I am relieved the water level and bubbles cover her nipples. It has been years since I have seen a naked woman and it is stirring something in me I deem inappropriate. I pour basins of water over her hair and work on shampooing the dirt out. Her hair is longer and thicker than Elizabeth's. And of course, Elizabeth was golden blonde. Bella's hair is so dark it is almost black. It takes ages to clean. I then run the conditioner through with a wide-tooth comb, the familiar action coming back to me easily. This is something I will never forget. The scents remind me so much of Elizabeth. I find I have been crying without realising. Bella is watching me curiously. It is none of her business. If she asks questions I will tell her so. Fortunately, she doesn't speak as I work.

I pour body wash on a loofah and wash her back. There are scars and bruises all over Bella's body. I find myself thinking of Bella more as a patient and less as a human. I can tell she notices the difference as she lets me examine her. I trained in veterinary school and was the top of my class. I gave it all up for Elizabeth. I swore never to touch it again after I lost her. If Bella were brought to me as an animal, I would have certainly reported abuse. It makes me wonder again, where she came from.

She let me examine her as I scrub her. Far from turning me on, her nipples repulse me. They have been burnt. Who would burn another's nipples? I wonder what I have in my medicine cupboard that will offer her any relief from the pain she must be in. When I finished washing her, I grab a clean bath sheet and hold it out for her. She stands letting me wrap it around her as she steps from the bath.

I wonder if this is normal for her. She seems so accustomed to being bathed by a stranger. Her deep brown, doe eyes follow me as I walk to my wardrobe to fish out one of my smallest tee shirts and a pair of tracksuit pants with a drawstring waist. It is all I can offer her, but it is clean and dry. I gather her clothes as I leave her to dress. I wonder if my washing machine has a super stain-busting setting. I settle for pouring disinfectant in with washing powder.

**-BPOV-**

I walk out to the living room. Edward is sitting on the sofa sipping coffee. He laughs at me. I know I look ridiculous in his oversize clothes so I laugh too. He kneels before me and rolls the hem of my pants up so I won't trip.

"Another coffee?" He asks. I nod.

He towel dries my hair and combs it gently as I sip my coffee. It feels nice to be clean. It has been so long since I have been truly clean. And warm. And dry. I wonder how Dad is, how long will it take him to die without me there?

"Where do you come from, Bella?" Edward asks. I have been quite happy with our silence so far. I had hoped he wouldn't ask questions. I don't answer this one. He speaks again.

"Yeah, I wouldn't tell my secrets to a stranger either."

He finishes my hair and I reach up to it, thrilled he braided it. I am never allowed to wear my hair back from my face at home. He excuses himself to take a shower, leaving me alone in the living room. I stand and walk to the display unit in the corner. He has photos there and I want to see them up close.

I start at the bottom of the display unit. I smile at the childhood photo of what are obviously Dr. McCarthy, Edward, and maybe a younger brother? They were adorable. Another photo is Dr. McCarthy's wedding. I have seen this photo on her office desk. Of course, Edward was in the wedding party. I can't believe I didn't remember him from this photo. More wedding photos, but Edward is the groom and his bride a beautiful blonde model. She is gorgeous. There are many photos of her, in most of them she is laughing. Where is she now? A photo of her pregnant and him with his arms wrapped protectively around her middle, so there is a child? I smile.

The disappointment I feel surprises me. Of course, even if he wasn't married, Edward would never have fancied me. I am surprised I want him to. I never wanted any of the other men to like me, not like that. Edward clears his throat behind me. I jump, startled.

**-EPOV-**

It has been years since I have pleasured myself and, damn it, my dick decides this morning it is the day to make its desires known. I assume it is the rose scented body wash that triggered this reaction. I use it as a lubricant in the shower, pumping myself gently while crying. I miss her so much. I am embarrassed to find it was images of Bella in my bath and not Elizabeth flooding my mind as I orgasm. I feel...empty...lighter and mightily confused.

After dressing, I return to the living room, surprised to find Bella staring at my shrine to Elizabeth. I clear my throat, immediately regretting the fact I startle her. Fortunately, she recovers quickly. Bella approaches me softly, taking my left hand, and fingering my white gold wedding band. I can see the silent question in her eyes. "Where is she?"

I crumble. Tears escape, unwanted and unbidden. Sobs wrack my body. I sit on the sofa and bury my head in my hands, elbows on my knees. Bella wraps her tiny body around me in a reassuring hug. I never let anyone hug me. If I can't have Elizabeth's hugs, I want none at all. But Bella doesn't know this. Bella's kind actions only make me cry harder. I am supposed to be offering her refuge. She shouldn't be comforting me.

I try my hardest to settle myself down. Bella stood soothing me. She makes me lie on the sofa. She brings me a pillow and a blanket. I try thanking her. She brings me a cup of green tea. My eyes spill over again. The green tea was Elizabeth's. I kept it all these years. I never drank the stuff because I think it tastes foul. I drink it now. Bella lies against me on the sofa, snuggling into me with the blanket between us. I wrap an arm around her; scared she will fall from the sofa if I forget she is there and move.

"She's no longer with us," Bella states. I croak a yes. That is a nice way of saying it. Elizabeth is no longer with us, no longer on this earth. "And the baby?" She asks gently.

"Was never born." I finish sadly.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She wraps both her hands around mine. I feel that maybe, yes, I can talk about it.

"I've never talked to anyone about it." I confess. What is it about Bella that makes me want to talk to her?

**-BPOV-**

Edward's pain scares me. I have never seen anyone in so much pain. I don't know what to do to make it go away. I can see now why the smile never reaches his eyes. He lost his wife and child. It hurts him every moment. I wonder if the sweet smelling shampoo he used on me was hers. He looks so sweet now, sleeping.

I slip from under his arm and begin to tidy his apartment. I take my clothes from the machine and start the dryer. I start a load of his laundry. I clean the kitchen, the bathroom. Cleaning keeps me sane. I have nothing to clean with at home. Dad knows I like to clean and so to punish me he took everything. Edward has lots to clean with. Everything I can imagine and more. Hours later, as I wait for the floors to dry after mopping, I hum happily. I feel useful again, human even.

I check through the pantry, working out what I can use to prepare a meal with. If he is like most men, he will be hungry when he wakes. The fridge has a few mouldy vegetables and a door full of condiments. Not much else. The pantry is a little better. I find enough to make vegetarian lasagna and I clean the fridge out as it cooks. When Edward stretches and yawns I move back to the living room.

"Feeling better?" I ask. He blushes.

"I'm so sorry! How long did I sleep?"

"Most of the afternoon, but that's okay. I think you needed it."

Edward blinks looking around. "Did you clean up?" He asks incredulously. I smile proudly and nod. He blushes again. "You didn't have to do that. I mean. I should have done that, the cleaning."

I reach out and touch his hand. I thought I was broken beyond repair, but Edward is worse. "It's okay, I enjoy cleaning. I started dinner too."

He smiles up at me and we stay in the moment for longer than is comfortable. Edward breaks it first, reaching for his laptop. "I suppose I should order some more food. I get the supermarket to deliver, I prefer to order online." I read between his words. He doesn't like to leave his apartment. I understand. "Is there anything you need?" He asks hesitantly. I shake my head.

"Well, would you like to order the groceries together? I'm not sure what you eat." He is persistent. I sit beside him; no longer worried he wants me for sex. I can tell he is different. He is broken.

**-EPOV-**

We finish ordering groceries and I remember how I meant to offer her some cream for her burns. I go to the kitchen and fish around in the drawer that holds such items. All I come up with is some ointment and a general moisturising cream. That will have to do.

"Ah, I was thinking you should probably put some ointment on your burns." I hold the ointment bottle out toward her and she nods. Instead of taking the ointment bottle from me, she removes her shirt. I am again left speechless. She is beautiful and half naked. She certainly has no issues with removing her clothes. I kneel in front of her and begin applying the antiseptic ointment to her burns. She looks away as I work, I wonder if it hurts. She reminds me so much of a wounded animal, standing still because it knows this is for the best, but hiding its pain at the same time.

I finish and move to sit next to her, turning her gently so I can do her back. They look like cigarette burns, some old and some fresh. I shake my head in disgust. I hold the tee-shirt up when I am done and help her back into it. I hope like hell she won't remove her pants. I don't think I'll be able to be professional at all if I see that.

I lift her bare feet from the ground and move her legs so she is sitting on the couch with her legs on my lap. I reach for the moisturising cream so I can rub her feet and she moves, trying to pull my feet into her lap. I laugh and move my feet onto the sofa. We rub moisturiser into each other's feet and talk quietly.

"Why would anyone burn you with cigarettes?"

"I don't always do as I'm told." She shrugs. I shivered.

"Your feet are all messed up." I observe as I rub the cream in. They are dry, calloused, and full of sores and lumps. Her toenails are torn and frail. She tries to pull her feet away and I grab them back, laughing. "I happen to like messed up feet." I assure her.

"Liar." She laughs back. "I don't really own any shoes. I guess I should be more careful."

I smile rubbing between her toes. She yelps and jumps.

"Shit!" I swore. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. Here, let me have a closer look." I turn the lamp beside the sofa on and pull her toes apart. There is fresh blood. I can see something protruding from her skin.

"Do you mind if I use my tweezers?" I ask her. She bites her lower lip and shakes her head. I reach over to the coffee table drawer that holds my limited manicure tools; a pair of clippers, an old file, and a pair of tweezers. I gently work the object out. It looks like a piece of glass. I hold a tissue over the gaping hole it left, waiting for the bleeding to stop. Bella continues rubbing my feet. I can't help but notice how good it feels.

"So, are we friends now?" Bella asks. Her question catches me off guard.

"Yes. I'd say we are quite good friends now." I smile as warmly as I can manage. I doubt she has many friends. I certainly have none. They dropped off one-by-one after the funeral. I stopped returning calls and emails. Eventually they stopped bothering. I only have my family now.

"Well, I was wondering if you, as a friend, will answer some questions." I consider her with amusement. This sounds like a trick.

"Sure." What do I have to lose?

"How did your wife die?"

I gasp. The question hurts more than it should. There is a simple answer and there is a complicated answer. I answer simply. "Suicide."

"Oh! I am so sorry!"

I shake my head. "Don't be. It wasn't your fault."

**-BPOV-**

I feel as if I intruded somehow. Suicide, why would she consider that with a husband as beautiful and perfect as Edward? I can tell there is more to the story, there has to be. He doesn't look like he wants to talk about it.

"Tell me your secret?" He asks. "I've told you mine." I smile sadly. He won't like me as much, once he knows my secret. I can tell he likes me now, he said we are friends.

"I'm a prostitute." I answer keeping my eyes downcast. He laughs. It pisses me off. I didn't laugh at his secret. I glare at him.

"I'm sorry!" He shrugs as he continues to laugh. "I guess I didn't expect that." He calms down. "How long have you been a prostitute for?" He asks me.

"About ten years now." I answer honestly. "I do it to pay for my Dad's medicine. He's dying."

"But you don't want to do it?" He seems worried.

"Not really."

"That's why you left?"

"Yeah. Kind of." I feel tears stinging my eyes. I don't want to cry. It has been a good day and I don't want to ruin it.

"Bella, how old are you?" He asks. I smile. A change of topic is most welcome.

"Nineteen on September 13." I answer truthfully. Edward looks confused, then angry, then hurt, then mad, then confused. I can't work him out. I decide to ignore his mood changes. "How old are you?" I ask in a pleasant voice, trying to distract him.

"Twenty-five on June 20," He doesn't seem distracted by my question.

"Edward." He looks at me as I speak his name. "What's wrong?"

"I'm confused." He doesn't look confused. He looks angry. "You've been a prostitute since you were...nine years old?" I nod. That pretty much sums up my life. That is when I stopped going to school, when Mum left, when Dad got sick, and when he needed money for medicine.

The timer on the oven beeps and I stand to check on our dinner, leaving Edward in his own thoughts as I serve our dinner. I am a horrible person letting my father die. He doesn't deserve to die. He deserves a better daughter than me. By the time I finish eating dinner with Edward, I make my decision.

**-EPOV-**

I now see why she is Rosalie's patient. Why didn't Rosie remove her from her father's house before now? I am devastated for Bella. The more I imagine what her life must be like, the sadder I become. And I thought I had problems.

The lasagna is delicious. But then, anything other than a microwave meal will be delicious at the moment. I am suddenly concerned for Bella's welfare and want to talk with Rosie. After dinner I excuse myself and sit on my bed with my phone. I take a few deep breaths before dialing Rosie. I know I am upset, but she doesn't need to know this.

Her husband, Emmett, answers. I make small talk with him as we wait for Rosie to finish showering. I am becoming more anxious by the minute. Finally, Rosie came on the line.

"What's up?"

"It's about Bella. I'm worried about her."

"You? Worried about someone other than yourself?" Rosie snorts. I suddenly hate my selfishness and myself since losing Elizabeth.

"Rosie, I'm serious. Did you know she's a prostitute?" I ask.

Rose considers this before speaking. "That's ridiculous Edward. She lives with her father. He's a retired police chief. He would have noticed and let me know by now."

"But that's just it! He's her pimp!" I am angry again. If Rose doesn't even know about this, what on earth _is_ she seeing Bella for?

"Edward she's known as a compulsive liar. He father told me so. You've got to take everything she says with a grain of salt."

"No Rosie! I've seen her naked. She's covered in burns and bruises. She's telling the truth!"

"You've seen her naked? What the fuck Edward? You're supposed to be offering her a safe place to live!"

"I didn't mean to! She just...got naked in front of me! I didn't ask her to!"

I hear Rosie taking a few deep breaths. "Is she there now?"

"Not in my room, no."

"Can you take the phone to her? I'd like to talk to her."

I sigh in defeat. "Sure." What does it matter if Rose believes her or not? At least she is away from her father.

I check the obvious places of the house before noticing a note on the dining table sitting on top of the neatly folded clothes I loaned her. I gasp and read the note to Rosie.

"Thanks for everything. I've gone home now. My Dad needs me." I am horrified. I sink to the floor, the note still in my hands. Her handwriting is childlike and deliberate. I start to cry.

"Eddie? Are you okay?"

"Rosie, where does she live? You have to tell me where she lives!" I have to save her, to hell with patient confidentiality. Fortunately, Rosie agrees with me.

I fly down the stairs of my apartment, two at a time and punch Bella's address into my car's navigation system as I barrel down the highway. She has almost an hour head start on me. Even if she walks she will be there by now. I shudder at thoughts of what her father could be doing to her now.

On an impulse, I call the police reporting a domestic disturbance at Bella's address. If there isn't one there already, there will be once I arrive. Satisfied, I hang up the phone and continue to speed toward her house.

**-BPOV-**

My feet hurt. I ran the whole way home. I knock on the door, relieved when Dad answers. He isn't dead yet.

"Dad! I'm so sorry!" I stumble into the house and he slaps me hard.

"You _will_ be sorry. You dirty tart. You cost me money going missing like that. How am I supposed to buy my medicine? Do you _want_ your old man to die?"

I begin to sob as Dad pulls me into the living room. I recognise his friends, my usual clientele, sitting around drinking. "She's back, boys. How should I punish her?"

Billy Black approaches me and leers. "Take your clothes off." He orders. I do as I am told. Pretty soon I am being passed around the living room like a party favour. I hate it.

"She smells nice Charlie. You should let her run away more often." I gag as one of the guests shoves his member into my mouth and he grips my hair. Another is inside me, but being pushed away as someone else fights for a turn.

"Keep sucking bitch!" I let my tears fall, no one notices. I think of what I have imagined ever since I was nine years old, my father's grave, me practically orphaned placing flowers over it. If I don't do this, Dad will die and that is what my life will be like. I can't run from them. I can't let Dad die.

I scream as someone extinguishes his cigarette on my back. "Ha! Look at her squirm when you do that."

"Do it again." I hold my breath this time as a cigarette is pushed into the back of my neck. I squirm, but at least I don't scream.

**-EPOV-**

I beat the police to the house by only half a minute. Long enough to see Bella naked and on all fours in the living room, a man trying to force himself into her arse while another has his cock in her mouth. She squirms as they extinguish a cigarette on the back of her neck. I saw red.

"Bella!" I yell as I barrel into the room, swinging the baseball bat I found in her front yard. I am mostly ignored. I hit the guy with his cock in her arse hard across his back. He growls at me and continues what he is doing. I can hardly believe it, what are these guys _on_?

"EVERYBODY, HANDS UP! ABOVE YOUR HEAD WHERE WE CAN SEE THEM!"

I follow the policeman's instructions along with everyone else. Bella scrambles to my feet, clinging to my ankles. I want to reach down and lift her up, but I am scared the police will shoot me if I move my hands.

A policewoman tries to move Bella, but she screams and kicks. "Please." I interrupt. "Please, I am the one who called you. Please, can I help her?" The policewoman eyes me carefully before nodding.

I sink to the floor, immediately pulling Bella into my arms. The policewoman drapes a blanket around Bella. I pull it tight, cocooning her before lifting her into my arms and carrying her out the door. There are police vehicles everywhere and an ambulance. I head for the ambulance with Bella in my arms.

"Don't leave me?" Her eyes are wide and scared. Why the hell she ever returned to this shit hole I have no idea, but I also have no intention of leaving her.

"I'm right here. I'm not leaving you."

The paramedics have other ideas. "I'm sorry sir. Only immediate family can ride with a patient." I make a spur of the moment decision. One I am sure will have negative repercussions.

"I'm her husband."

"Oh, come on then, we'll get her to the hospital."

**-BPOV-**

I hear Edward announce he is my husband moments before I lose consciousness. He has no idea how happy those words make me as I wake up, knowing full well I am in the hospital.

"How are you, love?" Edward asks, rubbing my hand gently.

"I'm okay." I smile shyly.

"That's what the doctors said too." He smiles back. "They said you can come home when you wake up."

"To your house?" I ask.

He raises his eyebrow. "To _our_ house." He corrects me. I giggle. This charade is fun.

Edward rubs my hand gently again. "Bella, I have something important to ask you."

I nod, concentrating on Edward's mood. He seems nervous. "Will you please be my girlfriend?" He asks with such sincerity I could cry.

"Yes. I'd love to." I choke out. He smiles in relief.

"That's great. I mean, I've already told Mum you're my girlfriend." He confesses and I look at him in wonder. "Well, I had to send someone to buy you some clothes." He explains and just in time too. A kind, older woman walks purposefully into my room with a handful of shopping bags.

"Well, hello Bella!" She exclaims. "I'm Esme, Edward's Mum." She holds her hand out and I shake it gently, wondering what she thinks I am in hospital for. Edward winks at me and I try to quell my fears.

Edward left his Mum to help me dress as he went to buy us all some 'decent' coffee, at his mother's request. I liked her immediately. She is so warm and welcoming. Once I am dressed I sit back on the hospital bed and wait for Edward. Esme holds both of my hands.

"Bella, I want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thank you." I am confused.

"What for?"

"For saving my son. I was so sure he was lost to us. It was just a matter of time. Thank you so much for being there for him. Lord knows he never talks to us." She wipes a tear from her eye. "He hasn't hugged me for over three years now. This morning when he called me here to see you, he hugged me." She is openly crying now. "Thank you so much Bella!"

I start to cry with her. Three years? That's how long it has been? I imagined maybe three months based on Edward's grieving. I thought of Edward trapped in his pain for three long and lonely years. Why hasn't Rosalie tried to help him like she helped me? I will ask her.

**-EPOV-**

I return with coffee finding Mum and Bella in a tearful embrace. I place the coffee beside the bed and hold my arms out to Bella. She hugs me back tightly. It feels right. I still have Rosalie to deal with. She will be angry. No, she will be livid. I am playing dirty by getting our parents on my side first.

Mum drives us back to my apartment. My car was stolen from outside Bella's house last night. The police called early this morning to say it has been recovered from a nearby swamp. I shake my head and smile. I don't care about my car. I used it twice in three years. I'll make an insurance claim later.

We walk out of the hospital, Bella and I with our arms around each other. I feel fresh, renewed even, by Bella agreeing to be my girlfriend. It gives me hope I haven't seen in years. Mum drives as I sit with Bella in the backseat of her car.

"Are you in much pain?" I ask anxiously when I see her wince.

Bella giggles. "No, my shoes are a little tight is all." She squeezes my hand and I reach down to pull her shoes off.

Mum smiles apologetically from the driver's seat. "I'm sorry, I guessed the size."

I piggyback Bella to my apartment as Mum follows with the few shopping bags. My apartment door is open and I pause. That isn't right. Mum went in ahead of us and I let Bella down. We follow cautiously behind hand in hand.

Alice meets me with a running jump. My tiny sister-in-law is always full of energy. I don't know her very well. Jasper met and married her in the years after Elizabeth's death. I am shocked at how much I don't remember from those years. I existed, but hardly lived.

"Bella, this is my sister-in-law, Alice, and my little brother, Jasper." Jasper comes to shake Bella's hand.

"Oh, Edward, I can't believe you didn't call ME to shop for Bella! You know I love shopping." I smile and blush a little. If I had ever known this, I forgot.

Alice and Jasper bought us all lunch. As much as I want Bella to myself right now, I gracefully allow them and my mother to stay. Alice is full of beans, obviously excited at the prospect of a new friend. Jasper is trying his best to calm her down. Mum is curious. "The place looks nice, Edward. You cleaned." She nods approvingly.

I blush again. "Actually, Bella cleaned."

"Oh, so you've been staying here, Bella?" I think I will die of embarrassment. Bella takes it all in stride though.

"Only in the spare room," she assures my mother.

"So how did you two meet?" Mum asks undeterred by my obvious embarrassment.

"Rosalie introduced us." I mumble and Mum tuts.

"I can't believe she didn't tell me, that daughter of mine!"

I hope Mum doesn't say anything to Rosie prematurely. I am sure I will be in enough trouble as it is!

**-BPOV-**

Edward's family is lovely. We share a lunch before they leave us for the afternoon. I hum happily as I clean the dishes. I am still a bit sore from yesterday, but am safe again. I will have to face the music on Monday when Rosie is back. She will take me to the police station, but until then I want to enjoy myself.

Edward comes and wraps his arms around me. "Are you sleepy?" He asks. I smile and turn around, hugging him back.

"Will you rest with me?" I ask.

"Of course."

He holds my hand as he leads me to his room. It feels comfortable and natural snuggling together on the bed. "Edward?"

"Mm?"

"Why did she end her life?"

I can almost hear him thinking of how best to answer. "She had a condition, a genetic condition. She was dying a slow and horrible death. It hadn't been too horrible so far, but we'd done our research. It would get worse. We didn't tell anyone."

He pauses and I wait anxiously for him to continue. "It was Motor Neurone. It would have killed her within a few years. There was no cure. When she became pregnant, she wanted the foetus tested. I didn't. After all, even if the test was positive, it was no indication that our child would present symptoms as early as Elizabeth had. She disagreed."

"We had the test at six months. It was a little girl. She had the condition. Elizabeth came to visit me at work later that day, devastated. I was working at the local veterinary hospital and Elizabeth often came in to cheer up my patients. The staff all knew her. No one questioned her when she took a few drugs home. By the time I finished work and got home, it was too late."

I gasped. I could feel Edward's tears through my shirt. "What did you do?"

"CPR." I smile at his simple answer, turning to face him, still holding him in my arms.

"Was it this house?"

Edward shook his head. "No, we lived in Phoenix then, in the sunshine. I moved here afterwards. I bought this place with her life insurance money. I haven't really worked since then." I stroke his cheek gently and he kisses my fingers as they pass his mouth. I smile and snuggle into him for a nap.

**-EPOV-**

I can't believe how much I told her and can't believe how much better I feel. She's curled into me now, fast asleep. I kiss her hair as she sleeps, beautiful.

When she wakes she is full of questions. Where will she live? How will she pay her way? I rub her back softly and assure her she has a home with me and will take care of her until she decides what she wants to do. I tell her she needs to focus on recovering before she can move on. She rolls to face me.

"Edward, I think you need to focus on recovering too." I start to cry. She's right. I tell her we can recover together.

The next morning as we stand in the kitchen sipping on our coffees, she surprises me. "Will you kiss me?"

I look up. "Now?" I ask hesitantly. I haven't brushed my teeth. It's been a very long time since I have kissed anyone. She nods nervously. I put my coffee down on the kitchen bench and watch her do the same.

Wapping my arm around her waist, I pull her towards me. She looks up at me with her big doe eyes and I melt towards her. Closing my eyes I feel my way to her lips. Its sweet and chaste, no tongue. I feel like a school boy again. I decide she deserves more. I cup her head with my free hand and pull her up to me, pushing myself inside her mouth deeply until she moans. I break away gasping. Her moan went straight to my dick, embarrassing me a little.

We each pick up our coffees again and after a few sips she's giggling. "What's so funny?" I ask. Her giggling is infectious. I'm starting to laugh despite myself.

"I really liked that." She says and I grin.

"Anytime, love. Just say the words."

"Kiss me." She taunts. My dick starts to throb again as I pull her close.

**-BPOV-**

We've been making out on the sofa like teenagers for hours now. Edward is a fantastic kisser. I'm surprised he didn't once try taking things further. I don't push him, it's not like sex is special to me anymore. I push the thought from my mind pulling him into another kiss. We're supposed to be watching a movie, but I haven't seen a single scene. I don't think Edward has either.

We slept curled together in Edward's bed. I like being in his arms, my head against his chest. His heartbeat is strong and regular. He mumbles and murmurs in his sleep. He snores lightly and cries. I wipe away his tears, surprised he cries in his sleep. I try committing everything about him to memory. I get the feeling this is too good to be true. Edward is too good to be true. This thought worries me.

Heavy thumping on the door wakes him up with a start. I am already frightened. Edward coaxes me out from under the bed, where I fled. The thumping on the door continues. He kisses me gently before taking my hand and walking to the door. I follow unwillingly and stand behind him as he opens the door.

"Edward! What the fuck are you playing at!" It is Dr. McCarthy and she sounds furious. I shrink down behind the door and cover myself in a coat.

"Good morning, Rosie. Aren't you delightful today?" I hear the sarcasm in Edward's voice.

"You can't have a relationship with my patient. I'm here to end it. I can't believe you even tried pulling that shit! She's severely traumatised and you fucking pull her into your bed? What the fuck? I expected better. And don't even try to blame this on your depression." She shakes her finger at him and I shake in fear.

"I can have a relationship with whomever I want. I don't need your permission. Bella isn't MY patient."

"Yes, but she is in your care. You took advantage of her. I'm not even going to have this discussion with you. It's ridiculous. I'm taking Bella to the police station. Maybe she can report you too."

"Don't be stupid, Rosie. It's five in the morning. Calm down and have a cup of coffee."

I watch Dr. McCarthy take a few deep breaths. "Yes. I need to calm down. Bella can't see me this angry." Edward snorts at her.

"Well you should have thought of that before you started yelling." He turns the kettle on and sits at the dining room table, an arm's reach from me. I scramble along the floor to his feet and cling to him. He pulls me up onto his lap, hugging me tight. I do not look at Dr. McCarthy.

"Fuck." She swears.

**-EPOV-**

I wait at home for them to finish at the police station. I'm restless. I want Bella back where I can see her. She was so scared after Rosie's little outburst this morning.

Rose texts me around noon. _**She's decided to stay in a women's shelter for now. It's for the best. Please leave her alone.**_

I sob. If it's Bella's choice, there is nothing I can do. Rosie explained this to us this morning as I held Bella's hand. She squeezed my hand reassuring me she will not choose to leave. She has chosen. She left. My huge wracking sobs leave me exhausted so I go to bed early.

When I wake it is only ten at night. Damn. I'm not sleepy anymore and have a whole night ahead of me. I decide to go for a jog. I haven't jogged since...I don't want to think about it. I push thoughts of Elizabeth from my mind. I try pushing thoughts of Bella from my mind, but it doesn't work.

As I jog through the quiet streets, my mind clears of everything except Bella. I want her back. I wonder how the past few days have felt to her. Did she regret kissing me? Did I really take advantage of her? Was it never real? I cry as I jog. The bus from Seattle overtakes me pulling up at the corner. I wonder if I should catch it. The women's shelter is in Seattle. My heart beats faster at the thought. But I promised to leave her alone if she chose to leave. I jog past the bus stop and around the corner when I crash into someone, knocking him or her to the ground. I gasp, winded.

**-BPOV-**

I stand shakily and check myself over for injuries. The jogger that knocked me over is crunched over and breathing heavily. "Edward?" I ask. It couldn't be. Could it? He stands and stares at me incredulously.

"Bella? What are you doing here?" He starts to smile before pulling me into a warm embrace.

I sob. "I've missed you!"

"You left me."

"No. I would never leave you. I was taken away. I've run away. I'm going to be in so much trouble." I fall against his chest and he holds me as I cry. "I couldn't find you. I didn't know your number. I don't even know your last name." I am now wailing pathetically.

"Hey, it's okay." He wipes my tear stained cheeks. "Why will you be in trouble?"

I gasp. "Because Dr. McCarthy told me not to find you and will be mad that I have."

Edward cradles me gently. "I think we're going to find you a new doctor." He soothes.

"Come on, I'll walk you home." Edward wraps his arm around my shoulders and we begin walking.

**-EPOV-**

Back at home, I still can't believe I have Bella back. She's in the shower now, singing. I smile at her choice of song. It's a children's nursery rhyme. I make us both cups of tea and bring them into the bedroom. We have been talking for hours. The sun is up now.

She emerges from the bathroom wearing only a towel. My heart skips a beat at the sight. "Edward?"

"Yes, love?" I ask, trying not to think about sex.

"Will you make love to me?" I gasp, wanting nothing more and yet wanting to take things slow with Bella. Like Rosie said, she _is_ traumatised. I didn't want to make it worse. Something inside me snapped into place. More than not _wanting_ to, I _couldn't_ refuse Bella. If she had asked for the moon I would have gladly ran and brought it to her.

I stand to kiss her and tug her towel off so she is naked under my hands. My dick is so fucking hard it's almost uncomfortable. But I have no intention of relieving it, this is all for her. I press Bella down onto the bed and begin trailing kisses down her body. I take my time reaching her core and can tell she is enjoying the tease.

She is waxed and it reminds me of what her father put her through. I imagine she didn't have a choice when it came to her grooming. I slide down her body swiping my tongue over her mound. She groans. It has been a long time since I have done this, making me nervous. Regardless of the fact Bella has a lot more experience than I do in a bedroom, I want so badly to make her happy. I want to hear her scream my name. Taking a breath, I bury my face in her moistness.

**-BPOV-**

I'm writhing in bed. My body is hot, yet I'm shivering at the same time. I have never felt this way before. Edward's tongue is touching places I have never felt. I moan and writhe again. I'm embarrassed at the thought of wanting to sit on his face. I want him deeper, harder. Oh god...I want him. I get a sudden urge to pee and my body tightens.

"Edward...I...have to...ungh...bathroom..." This is all I manage to pant out.

He grins pressing into me harder. "Just let it go." I hear him mumble in between sucking me. He must have misunderstood. There's no way I'm peeing on his face. The urge becomes desperate and I scream as it releases itself through my body.

"Edward...oh GOD!"

I'm panting hard and completely spent. I have no idea what the hell just happened, but fuck it felt good. Edward lies gently beside me on the bed.

"What was that?" I ask him.

"What was what?"

"That thing that just happened, didn't you feel it?"

Edward laughs. "Feel it? God, I can still _taste_ it." I watch him lick his lips. "That, my love, was an orgasm."

I smile, content. "My first." I murmur as I snuggle into his chest.

**-EPOV-**

Her first? I gave her the very first orgasm she's ever had? I feel like a legend right about now.

Three years later...

I'm trying to hang our wedding portrait while Bella is laughing at me. She framed our wedding portrait in the same size and colour as Elizabeth's. I hang them side-by-side in our new house. Bella stands back admiring my handiwork. I laugh at the intense scrutiny on her face and kiss her, completely taking her off task.

She laughs again and I feel our baby kick under my hand. I'm worried about the effect my antidepressants will have on our baby, but Bella isn't. She doesn't worry about anything these days. It's refreshing. Her father died of a drug overdose before the trial, saving Bella the trauma of testifying against him. All of those years she was feeding his heroin addiction she truly believed he was sick. We cried for a week after learning that. We see a counsellor together these days, a new one. Rosie wasn't working anyway. She and Emmett have their hands full with a growing family these days.

I kiss along the back of Bella's neck, thrilling her with goose pimples. The cigarette burns are small scars now, barely noticeable.

"If you keep that up Mr. Cullen, you will have to take me to our room." She scolds, still laughing.

I grin, "With pleasure, Mrs. Cullen."


End file.
